Here I Am
“Then I heard the voice of the Holy One saying, ‘Whom shall I send? Who will go for us?’ And I said, ‘Here am I; send me!’” — Isaiah 6:8
Like it or not, we all have them. And last Thursday one of them happened to Bonnie. It was her birthday. I think that event led the two of us to do a little reminiscing.
What we were reminiscing about? Memories of the first time we meet. Some of you, perhaps most of you, know the story. But some I’m sure do not. So, for those who do not know that piece of our personal history, let me very briefly repeat it.
Bonnie and I met nearly twenty-three years ago. We will have known each other for the full twenty-three years come July. When we first met I was thirty-nine and she was thirty-eight. We got married a year later; it was the first marriage for the both of us.
And please— don’t do the math. Neither of us admits to being as old as we are.
We met on a foggy island off the coast of Maine. That is, perhaps, more romantic sounding than the reality of it— it’s very rustic— but it does make for a great story, since our claim could be and often is that because of the fog we really couldn’t see each other— or at least we couldn’t see each others faults.
One of us— Bonnie— was the country mouse. One of us— me— was the city mouse. On paper, it should not have worked out. Not only were we country mouse and city mouse, we lived nearly four hundred miles and nearly seven hours apart— New York City and Brunswick, Maine. In reality— not on paper but in reality— it did and it does work. Explaining why something works is not often productive, so I try to avoid explanations.
But this is the explanation we like the best: from her perspective, Bonnie has always said it’s possible one reason we got together is she had stopped looking for a soul-mate— she had given up. She knew it was not going to happen.
I think my sentiments were similar but, given my background in musical theater, I most often stated them with words Alan Lerner wrote for character of Henry Higgins in My Fair Lady, words, I might add, Learner lifted directly from Shaw’s play Pygmalion on which My Fair Lady is based. This is the way I put it: I had decided that I was a (quote): “confirmed, old, mellowed bachelor and likely to remain so.”
In any case, the point to be made is, while I doubt either of us would have settled for just anyone, we were also ready. We were ready for each other and ready to enter into covenant commitment with one another. Further, while we may have thought our time had passed, we had not forsaken the possibility. We were open to the possibility.
It simply took us longer to get there then it takes some folks. Or, as I sometimes put it, we got married so late, we were demographically unacceptable. (Slight pause.)
And these words are from the Scroll of the Prophet Isaiah: “Then I heard the voice of the Holy One saying, ‘Whom shall I send? Who will go for us?’ And I said, ‘Here am I; send me!’” (Slight pause.)
I really don’t believe anyone would question this thesis: our society believes in quick fixes. Further, our society believes a solution to all our problems is likely to be a single solution dreamed up by a single individual.
This is a basic societal myth in America. It is the Indiana Jones, Rambo, Luke Skywalker— name the character— myth.
If I was unkind I’d say I think our society has a savior complex. But I will be a little more compassionate than that. I think our society has a rescuer complex. We seem to constantly look for a sole survivor, a super-hero who has all the answers— a politician, pastor, computer programer, program coordinator, prestidigitator or prognosticator who will solve all that ails us.
I think that is one reason we find this reading, this so called “Call of the Prophet Isaiah” appealing. We see the action offered by Isaiah as a quick fix offered by a single individual.
But that’s because we give this “Call of the Prophet” a shallow reading, not a close reading. On the surface we can see a perceived problem. On the surface we can see someone willing to come to the rescue. But how did those who first read this passage understand it? (Slight pause.)
One of my commentaries on this passage says today, in our era, for many readers, Isaiah is been lifted up as a heroic model of a servant of God— basically what I just said. But this heroism— if it is that— did not appear out of thin air. Rather, it is the sequence of events that leads up to this point and that sequence of events is at least of the same import, if not greater, than the event itself.
You seem there had been the encounter with the presence of God, a confession, a ritual of purification, the overhearing God as address the heavenly council and only then the acceptance of a commission. Additionally, the one who is enabled to hear the call and accept a commission to act as a representative of God has been purified, made whole by a divine messenger, by the very action of God. [1] (Slight pause.)
Do not misread my thrust here: the response of Isaiah to God is important. Our response to God is important. But what is, perhaps, most vital is asking how do we get to a place where response is possible? How do we become ready for a response? How can we be open to a response? How can we be prepared to respond?
Last, to what is it are we responding? Is it a specific call from God? Or is simply responding to our whole relationship with God? (Slight pause.)
In this month’s Newsletter, in February’s Newsletter, in my letter to the church I asked a couple of questions which I think are pertinent if we are to be in relationship with God.
That is because these questions might help us be open to a relationship with God. These were the questions: ‘Do I spend at least 20 minutes a day in prayer?’ ‘Do I read Scripture daily?’ ‘Do I offer a blessing at family meals?’ ‘Do I prepare for Sunday worship, that is: read over the lectionary before the worship, attend Bible Study before the worship?’ You see, our time on Sunday in worship is vital, but no more so than the rest of our time as we develop a relationship with God. (Slight pause.)
Back when Bonnie and I first met, when I went to church I sat with the congregation. I was a member of the laity. Bonnie did not marry a pastor. It was, hence, more of a shock to her than to me when I started seminary classes.
But when I was a member of the laity, when I sat in the pews, I was convinced of this and I am still convinced of it: we are all called to some community of God and those communities are commonly and often called church. That call may be this church. That call may be another church.
But we are all called. I am also convinced within a specific community, we are also called to something which helps the whole community.
So, when it comes to the question of call, the key ingredient may not be ‘how do I or how can I respond?’ The key may be ‘have I prepared my self to respond? Am I ready to respond?’
Now, there probably will be times in life— there certainly have been times in my life like this— when you will feel like you are stranded on an island in the fog. But that does not mean you cannot get ready and it does not mean you cannot be ready. After all, it is only when you are ready, it is only when you have developed a relationship with God that you can respond the way Isaiah did (quote) and say: “Here am I; send me!” Amen.
02/07/2010
United Church of Christ, First Congregational, Norwich, New York
ENDPIECE: It is the practice of the Pastor to speak after the Closing Hymn, but before the Benediction. This, then, is an précis of what the pastor said before the blessing: “If there is one lesson I’ve learned in life it’s don’t walk around in a fog. Be open to who you are. Be open to those around you. Be open to the voice of God. Ro be clear: in order to be open, especially to the voice of God you need to be ready to hear that voice.”
[1] This analysis is from The New Interpreter’s Bible Dictionary and its comments on that passage. It is the Electronic Version of that work, but it has all the same information as the printed version.
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